9 Ways To Stave Off Boredom In The Elderly
Is this you? You’re a family caregiver. You’re pulled in many directions. There’s very little margin. You’re doing your best to cover the bases: family, career, health and exercise, social connections and caring for your elderly loved one. Yet, you see your elderly loved one looking out the window when you leave for work, looking bored. When you see that bored look, it gives you butterflies in your stomach. You recognize that their social connections are static. Their work relationships faded with their retirement decades ago. Some family live nearby, but they are also pulled in many directions seemingly juggling your same whirlwind of responsibilities.
Read on, and take heart. I’m about to share with you nine ways to keep boredom from getting the best of your elder loved one. So they become more engaged with life. You’d be surprised that these steps just take a bit of your time, and the payoff can be huge.
Personal Purpose
Are they clear on their personal purpose?
Having a personal purpose addresses boredom head on. It helps folks to have a zest for the day when their feet hit the ground after getting out of bed in the morning.
In casual conversations ask your elderly loved one if they are clear on their personal purpose. In the internet article entitled How to Write a Personal Mission Statement, author Ken Coleman quotes author and career coach Dan Miller who “…says a good mission statement should include three things: 1. Your skills and abilities (what you like to do); 2. Your personality traits (how you operate); 3. Your values, dreams and passions (why you want to excel.)”¹
It’s okay if they don’t have a sense of purpose, you can help them identify it. It’s a journey – they can add to it, clarify it and share it with others. Areas to consider in crafting their purpose statement:
Family relationships – how the elder makes others feel in a positive way. Being intentional with words of encouragement, patience, good listening skills and their character.
How they contribute to society beyond their (immediate) family, community, in Senior Centers, places of worship, and to their neighbors
Legacy - how do they want to be remembered?
Share with your elderly loved one how their children, grandchildren, extended family, neighbors, and former co workers have shared how your elder loved one impacted their lives.
Connections With Family Members Outside The Home
How connected is your elderly loved one to family who do not live in your home and friends?
During the majority of the elder’s adult years, mass communication revolved around telephone, radio, television. They’re now in a whole new world of communication: smart phones, text, email, video conference. You might need to be in teaching mode with them. Start small. Establish connections with family members and friends living nearby or far away by teaching them to use one mode of ‘new’ communication at a time. Provide basic instructions on smart phone, text, email, may need to learn Zoom. If you’re stumped on teaching techniques, get help from YouTube instructional videos for these communications for beginners. Practice. Reinforce. Learn how to schedule get togethers in person or using technology. These get togethers can build social connections.
Senior Centers
Senior Centers across our nation play a large role in connecting seniors to services and resources for a healthy life.²
Senior Centers may provide the following programs and services ³:
Meal and nutrition programs
Information and assistance
Health, fitness and wellness programs
Transportation services
Public benefits counseling
Employment assistance
Volunteer and civic engagement opportunities
Social and recreational activities
Educational and arts programs
Intergenerational programs
Please note: each local Senior Center may not offer as comprehensive resources and programs as those listed above.
The local Senior Center in Paso Robles is the Paso Robles Senior Center, located at: 270 Scott Street. Tel: 805-237-3880. A helpful link to the Paso Robles Senior Center is found here:
https://www.prcity.com/293/Senior-Services
On their website, you may access the most recent monthly calendar of activities.
Their website also lists the following nutritional services information:
Nutrition Services
Weekdays: A hot lunch is served daily at 11:30 am, provided by Meals That Connect. Suggested donation is $3.00 per meal. Two day advance reservation is required. For reservations call Marlene at 805-238-4831. There is a form to complete and more information is available from Marlene. To see the monthly menu, click here: https://mealsthatconnect.org/dining-menus/4
Conversation Starters
Authentic communication brings about feelings of affirmation, belongingness, and dignity.
Seek to build rapport. It begins with trust. Look for common interests. Give them options about what they’d like to talk about.
Ask them open ended questions on their career, growing up years, and family.
Be aware of the timing of conversations. Choose the best times of day when they are most active physically and cognitively. Experiment with different subjects of conversations. Their favorite subjects will naturally come forward. May I please add - please keep the conversation topics positive. There’s enough discouraging news in the world – let your conversations be upbeat.
Getting Outdoors
Fresh air does wonders for the circulation and brain function. Help them to get moving. They will surely enjoy new perspectives since the outdoors provides discovery and exploration. Connecting to nature sparks intrigue. Another benefit is striking up conversations with neighbors.
If your elder loved one intends to walk and if it's appropriate, check with their medical provider if they are capable of regularly walking and if there are any accommodations needed such as a cane, or walker.
Walking trails within the city of Paso Robles - from City of Paso Robles site, found here: https://www.prcity.com/DocumentCenter/View/13737/Trail-Map-PDF
Is Your Elderly Loved One An Introvert, Extravert or Ambivert?
Knowing can make all the difference. Grace Tworek, PsyD of Cleveland Clinic defines an introvert as “An introvert is someone who is more inward-turning. They feel the most comfortable and thrive in their alone time. They may process things best when they’re alone.”5 Dr. Tworek defines an extravert as “Individuals (who) feel their most comfortable in a group setting. They like to think out loud, problem-solve with others and may even feel more energized around others,”6 An ambivert has a little introvert and extravert respectively. Recommend activities/social connections based on the personality characteristics of introvert/extravert/ambivert they most lean towards. Offer options. Gather feedback from them on the offered options.
Social Calendar In The Home
It's something to look forward to. Make it super visible. Take some real estate on the refrigerator door. Use large fonts. Make a free account on Canva.com. Print out free images or photos of the type of events on the social calendar. Visual (colorful) reminders keep the upcoming events top of mind.
Talk about the social calendar in the home.
If your elder will be meeting with friends/family members, call them ahead, to give a courtesy reminder of their upcoming meeting. That reminder will also give a personal touch.
The social calendar is an important part of the culture of the home. Take photos of past social events that your elder attended, print these and post them prominently in the home.
Developing Hobbies
This could be for inside or outside the home.
Enjoyable hobbies promote good feelings. Hobbies give elders something to talk about with others. It provides a sense of accomplishment.
When elders are fully engaged in an interesting hobby it’s when boredom could be farthest from their mind. Time feels like it moves fast. Some recommendations for local hobbies:
Discovering local history at The Paso Robles Historical Society and The Paso Robles Pioneer Museum
Bird watching at Barney Schwartz Park and Lake located in Paso Robles at 2970 Union Road.How An In-home Caregiver Can Help With Companionship
Our caregivers are selected for their ability to build rapport and to make social connections. They desire to bless your elderly loved one and your family. To do so, they take careful note of preferences. With companionship, considerations such as what the elder likes to talk about come into play. The caregiver’s engaging personality can buoy conversations.
If you’re interested in finding out how our caregivers can assist with providing meaningful conversation and companionship for your elder loved one, please contact us at 805-238-3500. We’d be happy to talk with you.
Conclusion
Helping an elderly loved one transform their boredom into engaged living may take some intentional planning. The good news is that these steps are simple and often low cost.
What one or two steps will you take this week to help your elderly loved one move from boredom to just a bit more towards engaged living?
Footnotes:
¹Coleman, Ken (12-27-23) How To Write A Personal Mission Statement. Retrieved (2-28-24) from: https://www.ramseysolutions.com/personal-growth/mission-statement-101
²National Council On Aging: Senior Centers For Professionals (8-3-23). Get The Facts On Senior Centers. Retrieved (2-27-24) from: https://www.ncoa.org/article/get-the-facts-on-senior-centers
4 https://mealsthatconnect.org/dining-menus/
5 Cleveland Clinic (7-26-22) Introverts vs. Extroverts: What's The Difference. Retrieved (2-27-24) from: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/introvert-vs-extrovert
6 ibid.,
